Brain-dump #1

First brain-dump in my fast. The fast has been going on roughly since 7 o'clock this morning (this means 8 hours by now), and really hasn't effected me that much, or at least, that was what I thought prior to writing this.

Is stated earlier, I've chosen to go all-in, cutting all cords, and staying away from all internet-related activities throughout the day. I would have expected by now to have almost craving-like feelings towards checking Facebook and Twitter, but actually the thing that annoys me the most, is the non-checking of my mail. Right now I have nine unread messages (according to the small icon at my phone, when I need to check the time), and as a person who fights for keeping a zero-inbox this is kind of frustrating! It surprises me that I'm not that concerned about the actual content and senders of these messages, and have convinced myself that since it's weekend, it can probably easily wait a day or two, but my fight to keep the counter a almost none, is postponed and I'd wish I'd find the option to toggle this information off. This has led me to dig out a small case for my phone, in which it can be stored throughout the day, not showing me anything at all. Even though the push-notifications is disabled, the different counters are still showing, wanting me to get rid of them, and I find it quite tempting.. The phone is now tucked in, in the case, and I'm only going to take the phone out, if it starts ringing!

By now I could tell from the tone, that I have received a text-message from someone. I don't now whether I should check it, or just ignore it, but for the sake of this fast, I've chosen to let it sit. I don't know if I am able to keep it unread for the rest of the day, since the thought of it's 'maybe-importance' still takes up place inside my head.

During my previous tracking of my media use, I found that I didn't have a lot of purpose connected to my use, and this bothered me a little. Now, I have a brand new smartphone incoming (from Germany), and the last couple of days I've been tracking it like a mad. This is due the fact that it was posted on wednesday, and the tracking have been showing no movement, whatsoever since! I'm therefore eager to see it move closer to me, and I've been wanting to check for any news since I woke up. This my sound kind of silly, since I'm, as mentioned, aware of it being weekend, which should mean that the package shouldn't be moving anyway. Hopefully great things come to those who wait..

Another thought I had a couple of ours ago, was if I should allow myself to check-in on news-sites. I somehow feel responsible for keeping up to date with the things going on, in the world around me, and as with social media, I don't want to feel left out, of important stuff. I decided it would be okay, to do a quick head-line check on my iPad, and did so. It was quite disturbing. I was hoping for real world, and actual news, and the site I checked has the whole front page plastered with fridays proclaimed 'scandal' in Dancing With The Stars. After a quick glance, I decided this wasn't worth breaking out of the all-in thinking, and that if I wanted news, I should instead turn on the TV watching the news sometime in the evening, for the sake of actually getting informed of real and relevant news. Actually I felt stupid for checking, both for the sake of my fast, but also because of the content displayed, I felt like I was wasting my time with this kind of news, instead of using it on more valuable stuff. Realizing this, I think I'm going to ask my girlfriend if we should go for a walk without our phones, spending time outside 'off the grid'.